With The Force Of A Million Tons Of TNT…

…it fell, and sounded like a bomb had gone off downstairs. I actually armed myself, because I thought Jihad had come to my house.

We were all upstairs, thank God, when the ceiling light globe, no doubt loosened by all of Johnny’s dancing upstairs over the years, crashed down to the laundry room floor with the force of a million tons of TNT!. The wife is currently doing what all wives should do: clean it up.

What? Well how do you, or anybody else know what a million tons of TNT! sound like going off? You cannot safely extrapolate from one pound, and then multiply. There are factors we don’t even know about yet in a conventional explosion of that size, and yet men in white coats will go on TV and intone their high-toned rubbish as if it were gospel.

Probably with the same face on the village barber had when he told you that the only way he could cure your child’s asthma was to bleed them.

That’s why I get a chuckle when some wide-eyed acolyte of Science As Religion assures me that his facts are correct because, well, they’re infallible, and unchangeable. At least until the next directive with the new facts is put out.

And have you ever heard two high level mathematicians aguing over their own arcane magicks? Two learned men, each convinced the other is an idiot for believing in the solution they came up with? And a fatwah from an Evolutionist is something to be feared. They will come to your house with torches.

Oh well, Christians can get goofy, too. I am so sick of Donald Wildmon ruining good television for me I could just puke. Put him and Fred Phelps and all of their followers into a large vacuum container, suck out all of their air, and the world would be a better, saner place. ‘The Book of Daniel’ was one darn good, cute, funny show, and I always got a laugh, and it made me think.

And speaking of sucking, now I have to buy a light cover. And that sucks. See?

I know I make this look easy, but don’t try this at home, folks. You could pull something.

7 Responses to With The Force Of A Million Tons Of TNT…

  1. Actually science is about observation and theories. Theories are ever changing. I saw an interesting Nova last night night on Neutrinos, how scientists always believed they had no mass, but through observation found out that they do have mass and that they could be responsible for all the matter in the universe. You probably didn’t see it because you most likely have PBS channel blocked :)

  2. Bane says:

    Actually, I read about that some time ago, but thanks for the heads up. Now we know where you get your fine education.

  3. AJW308 says:

    I had the same thing happen. The light fixture was old enough none of the modern globes would fit. I had to replace the whole light fixture.

  4. Equus says:

    I wish you would figure out where the fuck you want to be!

  5. Will says:

    Watch your language, Gregg.

  6. Billy D says:

    Hmm. Must be a fad. Last weekend I swatted a beetle bug on my kitchen ceiling fan and smashed the light globe underneath. Damned bugs.

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