I just read on The Glorious Dawn’s site that someone is having a dead dog name guessing contest…kill us all now, Oh Lord, for we have nothing better to do than die, apparently. Dumbest fucking thing I’ve heard since Clinton won the second time.

And besides, who gives a name to something you may have to eat? Pitiful. You ever see those 4H’ers crying and carrying on when Clarabell or Porky gets hauled off to the slaughterhouse after the contest is over? There’s a sight for sore eyes…some ambiguous looking female in a cowboy suit, blue ribbon in her hand, bawling like a milk calf as the trailer rounds the bend…warms the cockles of my heart, I’ll tell ya.

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