November 30, 2003

All Traitors Must Die…

Fernando Suarez del Solar will go to Baghdad to protest Bush administration policy. CNN’s Miguel Marquez reports (November 30)

So, his son gets killed in Iraq, and this is what we get.
I don’t have any idea what this pukes soldier kid was like, but, for sake of argument, let us say he was a True American Hero…so, what the fuck is his puke greaser asshole traitor of a ‘dad’ being allowed to go to Baghdad and put on a dog and pony show that can only benefit the enemy? And, yes, I include the traitorous Democrat Party (and John McCain) in that enemies list.

Kneeling in an alley behind a police station, his hands tie-wrapped behind his back, and a bullet to the back of the head is all this bastardo deserves…hey, the Chicoms got something right.


November 30, 2003

Boobs will never be extinct!

The female breast is too wonderful a thing, Maury…don’t be a dolt.

Oh, hi, folks…didn’t see you there. Just taking a retard from another blog to task for his stupid comment about me. Called me a redneck, too. I have some redneck tendencies, to be sure, but…really! What a homo.

Again, if you’ve just arrived here from somewhere, go read all my stuff, then judge me. Most of you have such an ingrained kneejerk reaction to anything that doesn’t fit the paradigm that was brainwashed into you in your sorry-ass public skools that your thinking muscle has grown as flaccid as the Popes’ dick. Grow up and think for yourselves.

If I’m such a rascist, how come you can’t find one instance here of me using the dreaded N word towards blacks? Hmmmm? Negroe doesn’t count…MLK used it himself in his greatest speeches, so just shut up about that.

If you read all my stuff, and still don’t like me, just be comforted that I hate you more, I’m prettier than you, I have many many children to carry on my line, I’m smarter than you, my wife is prettier than yours, and…well, I could just go on and on, but you get the picture.

Kiss kiss!


November 30, 2003

Racial Diversialisisity…

I have thought and thought, thunk and thunk, and pondered long, and I have come to the conclusion that black people are different than white people. Oh, to be sure, much as men can imitate women, blacks can imitate whites, and vice versa, but somewhere, deep inside, we are different. There is not too much that is more pitiful than a man cross-dressing as a woman, or a white man cross-racing as a black man. It makes both parties being imitated uncomfortable when they see it…kinda makes you get in touch with your ‘inner yuck’.

Whereas a cross-dresser of either sex is just plain sad, it is equally okay to be black as it is to be white. Whites do not generally feel uncomfortable when a black person ‘acts white’, and in many cases, it is not acting, but that the black person has been around whites so long, or from such an early age, that he or she has imprinted on them as might a gosling imprint on a dog, if a dog is the first thing it sees after hatching.

A white person acting black, on the other hand, makes both whites and blacks uncomfortable…mostly, I think, because they can’t pull it off without looking silly, showing themselves as reflected in a cracked, flawed mirror.

I have dated many black women over the years, and socialized both superficially and intimately with black people from all social strata. I can say, with some authority, that they tend to be far more prejudiced, or let’s call it ‘racially aware’ than white people are. Where whites do not wake up in the morning considering and pondering their whiteness, that subject occupies much of a black persons thinking during their entire day. They even judge each other…whether someone is light or dark black, the color of their hair, and so on. They have as many racial terms for their own kind as an Eskimo has names for snow.

What I like most about blacks is their women, but a close second is that they hate mexicans as much as I do. [Note, I didn’t say ‘mexican-Americans’…do not hyphenate around me, or I will smack you. You are either an African or a mexican, or you are an American. I hate black Africans even more than I hate mexicans.]

In summation: Blacks, like women, are an alien life form with which white men share many characteristics, and can interbreed with. Some blacks, like some women, are bad, and their bullshit should not be tolerated.

Thank you, that is all (for now).


Apparently some reading impaired cretins are misconscrewing my words above to read that I hate Americans of color other than white. I am not responsible for these cretins poor education, or blows to their soft spots during their formative years. Read it and make up your own mind.
Shucks, I hate white people, too, dummies. I’m called Bane, for hecks sake!


November 29, 2003

It has come to Bane’s attention that there may be some Iraqis who are actually worthy of not being shot. One of these might be Alaa. I am slowly beginning to find more of his kind.

Too bad it is so slow, because, if necessary, we will burn down the barn to kill the rats.

I am still pondering…

Mahoud (and you know who you are…drives your raghead-ass nuts I don’t have comments, don’t it?), the not shooting part does not include you. Or your family. Or your pets. Asshole.


November 29, 2003

Some Maudlin Thoughts For The Holidays…

This should once again confirm that the most important
information in your life won’t come from a teacher,
the library or the Internet, but from a mentor, and on
a very personal level.

My long-passed grandfather’s birthday is coming up,
and for me it is a time to reminisce. The long walks
we used to take. The long drives. The special trips he
would make to pick me up so I could spend weekends
with him, and the advice he used to give!

Much was wasted because I was young when he died.
If he were alive today and sharing his gems of wisdom,
I’d be a better man. Those gems were well and good,
but the one I remember most, the jewel in the crown
of grand fatherly advice, came when he paused, looked
me in the eye and said …

“Don’t marry a woman with big hands. It makes your
pecker look smaller”

……..Brings a tear to your eye doesn’t it?


November 28, 2003

You Know Who Is The Man…

Ya know what? The most powerful man in the entire world flew the most recognizable plane in the world into arguably the hottest combat zone in the world, stayed for over two hours, and had dinner.

Fuck all these little crying whining pussy pundit bitches who are bloviating about it. And especially the Iraqis, those turd-world goatherd motherfuckers. And don’t their so-called ‘elite’, when interviewed at home, look like so many Amway and Mary-Kay hucksters?

I just caught a segment on CNN where they were actually interviewing an Al Jizzeera terrorspondent about how he felt about the whole thing. Talk about strange bedfellows. The oriental CNN terrorspondent had really cute, really deep dimples…no doubt from sucking so hard for so long. She could probably remove the pelt from a ferret with one slurp.

GW is my President. If he ain’t yours, you’ve got me for an implacable, heartless enemy, and I hope your lineage stops at you.


November 28, 2003

Deck The Walls…

My Ascending Colon is playing fun holiday games with my Descending Colon today…right now, it’s ‘peek-a-boo’. I get the urge to go download some corn, and then one of the kids distracts me, and it goes away…but I can feel it lurking just beyond the shoals of my colon, like the shark in Jaws…Ba-dum…Ba-dum…Ba-dumBa-dumBa-dum…. then nothing but a swirl of tail, or perhaps…was that a fin?

I expect, later, to be lifted from the bowl like a car on a hydraulic lift…”Honey! Get the axe and come help me down from here!”…teetering up near the ceiling while the kids watch, goggle-eyed. Science may wish to stop by and count the rings, or check for interesting primordial sediment. Great, they can have it, if they’ve got the men to haul it out of the house, cuz that Heinie-kin sure ain’t gonna go down the plumbing without a good fight…one that likely involves chainsaws and flamethrowers.

Life will find a way…