With The Force Of A Million Tons Of TNT…

…it fell, and sounded like a bomb had gone off downstairs. I actually armed myself, because I thought Jihad had come to my house.

We were all upstairs, thank God, when the ceiling light globe, no doubt loosened by all of Johnny’s dancing upstairs over the years, crashed down to the laundry room floor with the force of a million tons of TNT!. The wife is currently doing what all wives should do: clean it up.

What? Well how do you, or anybody else know what a million tons of TNT! sound like going off? You cannot safely extrapolate from one pound, and then multiply. There are factors we don’t even know about yet in a conventional explosion of that size, and yet men in white coats will go on TV and intone their high-toned rubbish as if it were gospel.

Probably with the same face on the village barber had when he told you that the only way he could cure your child’s asthma was to bleed them.

That’s why I get a chuckle when some wide-eyed acolyte of Science As Religion assures me that his facts are correct because, well, they’re infallible, and unchangeable. At least until the next directive with the new facts is put out.

And have you ever heard two high level mathematicians aguing over their own arcane magicks? Two learned men, each convinced the other is an idiot for believing in the solution they came up with? And a fatwah from an Evolutionist is something to be feared. They will come to your house with torches.

Oh well, Christians can get goofy, too. I am so sick of Donald Wildmon ruining good television for me I could just puke. Put him and Fred Phelps and all of their followers into a large vacuum container, suck out all of their air, and the world would be a better, saner place. ‘The Book of Daniel’ was one darn good, cute, funny show, and I always got a laugh, and it made me think.

And speaking of sucking, now I have to buy a light cover. And that sucks. See?

I know I make this look easy, but don’t try this at home, folks. You could pull something.

I Can Be Wrong…

I have made a complete 180 on this UAE ports deal. This and this convinced me. Read them and tell me what you think.

I now fully support the sale, with reservations.

Update:

But wait, there’s more. Good stuff.

This Is Wrong…

Sure, fire the stupid fucker. Ban him from working in his chosen profession, and revoke his degree, because, like Ward Churchill, he is too stupid to be allowed any access to moldable minds. Like a child molester, he should never be allowed around children again.

But prison? Three years? Fuhuck me.

First they came for the Holocaust Deniers…

 

Let The Record Show…

…that in a Presidential race between Hell-Hag Hillary and Condomluzer Rice, I would cast my vote for the Hag to attempt to keep Condi out.

I think she’s weak. I think she’s a born liar. I think she is a crafty tool of Bad People, and I think she is a terrible choice for any job choice outside of, perhaps, housekeeper or limo vacuumer.

I’ll never vote for another Bush, and I could care less if they impeach this one. I think Dick Cheney would make a fine President, and I’d vote for him in a snap. I wish Rumsfeld would run. We need a Warlord. Failing that, I would LOVE to see Bolton in as Prez.

Just never Condi.

 

Oddly Enough…

…I have absolutely no problem with this.

 Foreign corporations go into these countries and rape them of their natural resources, and give little or nothing back. They destroy the country ecologically, and corrupt governments. I’d be fucking their shit up, too.

Sadly, the corporations make things ripe for Marxist assholes to come in and raise up and train guerilla armies, and then we have an additional problem to deal with, all of our own making.

I will freely admit that America has had a generous portion of the blame for helping to make Africa the Marxist dominated shithole it is today.

And the greed of African leaders, coupled with the curse of Tribalism, will keep it that way, I’m afraid.

Mountains Out Of Dung-Heaps…

I was making some toast this morning and I had the TV on in the background.

Fox News was playing Robert Blake’s prelim, and I could give a shit if that turd lives or dies, but my ears pricked up when I heard the Prosecutor ask the M.E. a question about how many autopsies he’d performed.

The M.E. stated that he’d performed “4,500 autopsies, 1,000 of which were gunshot homicides…” Hmmmm….according to the anti-gun zealots, I would have guessed that the gunshot homicides would have been at least 4,499, with the 4,500th having being bludgeoned to death by a gun, or perhaps dieing from the shock of having been shown a picture of a gun.

Could our beloved anti-gun zealots be exaggerating a bit? Now, how about the anti-SUV crowd?

Ooops, there I did it…calling them a crowd. I’ve only heard five or six people talking trash about SUV’s, and here I am making them into a crowd…

See how this works?

Fuck Germany…

I read a comment by some German where he complained about Americans reminding Europe of their debt to us for our sacrifices during WW2.

He says that no one he knows, including himself has ever suffered under a dictatorship and whatnot, so why does he owe us anything?

Hmmmm, makes sense to me. I’ll trade you liberals that, and you give me no more pestering about slave reparations, and we’ll call it even, okay?

Hey, I never fought in WW2, either, and I never met any of my relatives at family reunions who died over there, so I never got the opportunity to miss sitting around and talking with them.

I’ve got nothing to lose on this one, just shut the heck up about slave reparations and we have a deal.

Oh, and Kraut-boy? Don’t whine when we pull out our 80,000 or so troops that made it so you could ‘wake up in a democracy every morning’…don’t whine when your economy collapses because our military quit buying your crap and paying you rent.

And I’m sure your great German military will be able to keep you safe when we’re gone, and other countries start licking their lips at the fat little German baby that is laying unprotected in the woods.

Hey, call on your allies the French if you need anything, okay? Let me know how all this works out for you, buddy…auf wienersen!

“…U.S. forces are not permitted to follow al-Qaida forces back into Pakistan when they flee.”

Boy, there’s that dog-chain rattlin’ down the porch steps again… The Gulf? Laos/Cambodia? Ring a bell? Shitheads never learn. Of course, like Laos/Cambodia, Nixon bombed and insurged anyway. I have high hopes that Bush is just collecting satellite and drone imagery preparatory to a massive B-52 strike (Gosh, I wish you could pay to sponsor a bomb and have your own message put on it. It’d help the war effort, and be a heckuva lotta fun for the folks back here playing at home!).
I have high hopes that we’ve made a secret alliance with India, so when the balloon goes up in Iraq this November, India nukes the piss out of Pakistan, parts of China, and we nuke the parts of China they missed. Russia’d go along with it, too, if the plan was tight and they were cut in on the booty. Heck, give the Russkies operational control of the launches, and have their observers everywhere but on our subs!
Using tactical nukes and air power to supplement India’s First Strike, the Chink War Machine could be decimated within, say, a week at the outside. With Pakistan shattered, and the US pounding the crap out of any Muslum country who doesn’t just shut the fuck up, India could send in whatever manpower was neccesary to mop up in China. With a decent propaganda effort, we could probably convince the surviving Chinks we just helped them out!
I’m not convinced that this would bring on Armegeddon, and I’m a little disappointed about that. Oh well, we’ll just have to try harder next time.

Hearing Today…

…that the Liberal-tarian Party supports ‘immigrant rights’ is the last straw for me. I’ve been skeptical about them all along for their drug stance, now they just may as well run Nader as their candidate.

What limp-wristed assholes…there will NEVER be a successful third party in a nationwide election in this country, and the other two parties are nearly indistinguishable. It’s been said before, if you want the job, you shouldn’t be allowed to have it.
I think every American at the age of 18 should have to take a test, kinda like a cross between the SAT’s and an immigrant style citizenship test, and get a certain score to be able to participate in the benefits of society, i.e, get a driver’s license, drive on public roads, etc.

From this pool, a supercomputer would pick, lottery style, people to fill in every position from President on down. Then, elections will be held for every position every four years, and Americans will vote with their social security number for the candidates. Any irregularity (i.e., multiple uses of a number) will lead to that vote being discarded and a letter generated to the last known good address of the SSN holder to allow them to clear things up. Any candidate who fails to recieve a certain percentage of votes would ‘lose’ and be replaced by the computer. Fraud carries an automatic death sentence.

Voting would last one week, and your voting receipt would give you one month out of the next twelve to be tax free, and be an automatic entry into a National Lottery where the pot is never below $50 million dollars. There would be no term limits.

Every candidate chosen for governerships on up would also have to take a psychiatric exam. All successful candidates would be paid extravagantly to avoid the temptation of corruption, and would remain tax-free for the rest of their lives, even those serving only one term.
Those pigs in Washington would never allow such a thing, of course…I think I hear the Black Helicopters already. I better go get a last beer outta the fridge before they kick in my door…goodbye…

Well, Florida…

… has served us up another big ole plate of Stupid…is it any wonder I kneel by my little bed every night and pray for nuclear war? This planet needs an enema, and I hope God sticks the nozzle right in Florida. What a pack of dipshits…and it’s the same three counties that fucked up during the Gore/Bush fiasco.
Can we just have a nice, benign military dictatorship? Please? Fuck democracy…we’re a Republic, anyway. When ‘Politician’ and ‘diseased, runny anus’ become synonyms, I think it is time for a change. Let’s use my aforementioned ‘raghead removal method’…if everybody went out and shot just one politician, from dog-catcher on up, we could all start over, eh?
Oh, and I had a thought last night…why do we let foreigners buy controlling interests in American companies? The Saudis and whoever else could foreclose on this country and cripple us without firing a shot. What fucking lemmings we are…
And FURTHERMORE: is it my imagination, or is every single gun company in America now wholly owned by a foreign corporation? Correct me if I’m wrong…sad, too, because now the only ‘deals’ I can find in gunshops and gunshows are shitty foreign made police pistols…fuckers rattle when you shake em. Oh well, at least all my Colts have tripled in value…